Leave Your Lover
by myladylove
Summary: You'll never know the endless nights, the rhyming of the rain, or how it feels to fall behind and watch you call his name. Pack up and leave everything, don't you see what I can bring. Just leave your lover, leave him for me.
1. Prologue

**Leave Your Lover:****_ Prologue_**

**Anastasia **

"You promised me that you'd never leave me!" He screams as I quickly shove some of my clothes into my Louise Vuitton duffle bag.

"Why shouldn't I leave you, when you're constantly leaving me?" I whisper through my deep cries as I look at my boyfriend.

"I have never once left you!" He grits out angrily and I can see the tears build in his eyes. Those eyes that I've spent so many years looking into, hoping that one day I'd feel love looking back at me. But I never have, not truly.

"Bullshit. What about the night that I told you I was pregnant? And then when I lost the baby? You left me. Alone. I had to deal with things without you because they were too hard for you. How do you think_ I_ felt? You've always run away. I'm the one who has always stayed."

"It's not as if you were alone, Anastasia. You were with that_ friend_ of yours. You were with _him_. You always are."

"He's the only one who is ever there for me." I tell him sadly and zip up my bag.

"Don't leave me." He begs once more as large tears drop from his eyes.

"I'm sorry." I manage to choke out before I grab my overnight bag and sling it onto my shoulder.

I'm barely able to make it out of the front door of my house before I am completely overcome by my tears. I can feel my throat burn from holding back my heart wrenching cries and my head hurts from the enormous strain I am putting on myself and my boyfriend. The man of so many women's dreams. But after 2 unhappy years together, I know things need to change and time apart from each other might do that. I knew going into our relationship that things would be hard. I wanted to marry a man who was married to his work. It's not his fault, he warned me of the danger in the beginning. But I never listened. When I met him, I was so enthralled with his charming personality and god-like good looks that his overall self seemed to outshine the hardships that would face us in the future. We moved in together soon after we started dating, much to the dismay of my friends and family, but I just had to have him. He had women throwing themselves at him, and yet he chose me. I had to jump into a life with him while I had the chance.

There have been long and lonely nights that I have had to spend without him, but I always thought that it was something that I could get used to. However, when I woke up alone on our 2nd anniversary and didn't hear from him until afternoon, I knew that a life with a man that would willing to leave a woman he loves on a day such as that for a day at work without a second thought, wasn't one that I wanted. That was three weeks ago, and after using that time to try and talk myself out of what I was doing, I finally told him today that I wasn't happy. It seems selfish to me, but I want to feel loved and I want to be with someone who _wants_ to be with me over everything else. If he can't see that, I don't know what that will mean for us.

I unsafely drive my disoriented self to the one place I know will bring me comfort. To _him_. He's been my best friend for so long, and to the dismay of my boyfriend, he and I have remained close friends through my dysfunctional relationship. As I pull into the apartment's underground garage, I grant myself a smile as I think of what he'll say when he sees me at his door. _'My sunshine.'_ It's what he says each and every time he sees me. This is always where I come when something is wrong. He's always the one that's there for me.

I stand in the elevator waiting to be whisked into the foyer where he'll greet me. My bag is clutched tightly in my right hand that's clammy and shaky as I impatiently wait. As the elevator pings announcing its arrival to his apartment, I take a deep breath and step out of the cart. I let myself in and stand motionless in the foyer where I see him standing across from me, leaning against the wall with a wary smile playing on his lips. I know it's not a sincere smile, but one that's meant to try and comfort me.

I drop my bag where I stand and rush into his arms. He immediately clutches me tightly to his chest and with one arms like a steel band around my back, the other lets his hand brush gently through my hair.

"Ana." He breathes in my hair and kisses my ear. "My sunshine."

I can't help but start crying all over again as I feel the comfort of his embrace. I know that no matter what happens in this world, I'll always have this. I'll always have him.

"How'd you know I was coming?"

"The security system dinged when you entered the code for the elevator, and who else would be coming to visit me?" He chuckles at the last bit and pulls back to look at my face. His hand leaves my hair and cups my cheek as he looks deeply in my eyes. And that's when I finally see it. That look in the eyes of someone that loves you, where you feel loved by that person, just by the look in your eyes. The look that's been absent from my boyfriend's eyes, I finally see in the eyes of my best friend.

I gasp in realization of the emotions I feel in this moment and close my eyes as I savor his touch on my face. I feel his thumb drawing circles on my skin and I swallow hard as it hits me deep down in my stomach. _I love him._ When I open my eyes again, he's still looking at me and put my head on his chest, where only I can touch, and hold him tighter.

"Christian." I whisper as it's the only thing willing to come out of my mouth.

"I'm here, my sunshine. I'm always here." Christian tells me as he keeps me in his arms and sways us back and forth.


	2. Chapter 1

**A/N**

Questions:

This is a different storyline, Christian doesn't have the same background, and therefore there is no BDSM.

It's 2015 in this story and Christian is 25, while Ana is 23. This chapter has a Part II which I'll post in a few days. It gives a little background of Christian and Ana.

Thank you so much for the follows, favorites and kind reviews. That's all very nice. :)

**Leave Your Lover:****_ Chapter 1- Flashbacks Part I _**

**Christian **

"Have you talked to Mark today?" I ask Ana as she shovels more popcorn in her mouth and I continue to massage her feet that sit in my lap. We're watching a god-awful Nicholas Sparks marathon in my media room, and during an infrequent commercial break, I can't help but ask her about him.

"Way to ruin my feel good mood." She murmurs with her mouth still full. Honestly, she looks adorable and I can't help but smile at her.

"Landon was about to find out Jamie has cancer, you wouldn't have been feeling good for long." I tell her and one of her feet rises to kick me in my stomach. I tickle her feet and when she laughs loudly, I smile broadly. _She's so beautiful when she laughs._

"No. I saw that he left me two voicemails while I was asleep, but I haven't listened to them." She huffs and reaches over to take a large gulp of her diet-coke. She rarely eats junk food, but when she does, she doesn't hold back. She has M&M's and Hersey's Kisses bags on either side of her and a large bowl of popcorn balanced on her stomach. Her hair is a mess as it rests in a sloppy bun atop of her head and she's dressed in yoga pants and one of her ratty college t-shirts from our Harvard days. And she couldn't look more gorgeous. It's been a week since she left Mark, and we've both taken time off of work to be here together. "I know that I need to talk to him after that fight to end all fights we had last night. He and I have a lot to talk about, but I'm just not ready to hear his voice. Especially after how he yelled at me on the phone last night."

Tears are starting to well in her big blue eyes and so I run a hand from the top of her foot past her ankle and back in a comforting gesture. What I really want to do is take her in my arms and never let go, but that's not what she wants. It's becoming increasingly hard to control my feelings for her, but I know that she just sees me as a friend, and I could never ruin our relationship by telling her my true feelings, so I keep my mouth shut. As much as it hurts me, that's what I have to do.

"Ooh, it's back on." She wiggles her feet and focuses back on my big screen to watch the movie as I continue to look at her.

While she watches, I can't help but think about the first time I laid eyes on this beautiful girl so many years ago.

* * *

><p><em>August 2010<em>

_"Mower, Mower, Mower, where are you?" I hear a soft murmur behind me and turn to see a young girl looking disoriented as she stares intently down at a piece of paper in her hands. "I know you're here somewhere." _

_She looks up and twists and turns her head all around her to scout her surroundings only to soon furrow her brow and look back down at her paper. _

_"Miss?" I call to her but she doesn't look up. "Miss?" I try a little louder and her head pops up with wide eyes as she looks to me. "Something wrong?" _

_"Oh, uh." She gently shakes her head and glances to her paper and then back at me. "I, um, I know my dorm is somewhere around here. I just can't remember where. I toured it during orientation, but I just can't seem to remember where it is." She's rambling and getting frustrated and it's the most alluring sight I have ever seen. _

_"What dorm? I can help you if you like." I tell her and she looks relieved. _

_"It's Mower. Do you know where that is?" She asks me with a sweet, innocent smile and I can't help but smile back. She quite possibly could be the most gorgeous girl I have ever seen. _

_"Yeah, just follow me." I say and she smiles even wider as she walks closer to me so that I can guide us in the right direction. "I'm Christian, by the way." _

_"I'm Anastasia. Well, Ana. What year are you?" She asks me and I look down at her. _

_"Junior. I'll safely assume you're a freshman." She giggles and nods her head. "What're you here to study?" _

_"I'm undecided. But I really want to be a writer." She smiles brightly at me. "What about you?" _

_"Business." I tell her and she stops walking so I do too. She looks me up and down for a few moments before nodding her head and continues walking. "What was that?" _

_"I was seeing if I could picture you in one of those fancy three piece suits, sitting behind a big desk while being master of the universe." She tells me while she continues to look forward._

_"And?" I ask. _

_"I could picture it." She turns her face to look up at me and grins. _

_We walk for a bit more and talk about our hometowns. Turns out she's from Washington too and only a few hours from me. And I tell her about my older brother and younger sister. All too soon we're standing in front of Mower hall and looking at each other. _

_"Well, here we are." I tell her. _

_"Thank you. I can tell my dad how to get here now so that we can start moving my car load of stuff in." She giggles and I realize that I don't want to leave her presence. _

_"Yeah, well." I run a hand through my hair trying to think of something to keep me with her. "Do you, uh, do you need help moving all of your things in?" _

_"Oh, oh, no. You've already helped me enough. Really, thank you though." She looks at me and I wonder why she blushes when she does. _

_"It's no trouble. You did say it was a carload." I smile at her with all of my Grey charm that I'm sure she won't be able to say no to. _

_"If you're sure, I mean I can bet you have things to do. Better things than helping a stranger move into her dorm." _

_"I'd love to help you, Anastasia." _

_"Thank you, Christian. Let me just call my dad and tell him where to park." She tells me as she pulls her phone from her purse and walks a few paces from me. As I watch her from where I stand, I realize that this won't be my last encounter with this beautiful girl. And I am so thankful for that._

* * *

><p>"Christian!" Ana calls me from my musings and I look over to her. She has a smirk on her face and she sits up so that she's closer to me. "What were you thinking about? You looked awfully dazed, mister."<p>

"I was just thinking about Harvard." I tell her and she gives me a sad smile.

"Back in the good old days." She says before turning to nestle into my side and places her legs over mine. Instinctually, my arms wrap around her to bring her body closer to mine. "I miss those days."

"Hm, me too." I kiss the top of her head and then let my cheek rest there as we both remain silent for the rest of the film and rest comfortably in one another's company.

"I have to go to my parent's house tomorrow. Do you want to go with me, or do you want to stay here while I'm gone?" I ask Ana as the two of us load my dishwasher. It's strange how domestic we are when she's here. Usually, I depend on Mrs. Jones, but when doing housework with Ana, it doesn't seem bad at all.

"I love going over there, Christian. Of course I'm going." She tells me with her hands placed on her hips.

"I just didn't know how you felt with going out. We haven't left this apartment since Sunday." I laugh at our ability to be hermits.

"I know. But your family is my family too. I love seeing them." She smiles and I think of what I wouldn't give to have my family _really_ be her family. I'd marry her tomorrow if she'd let me.

"Good. Are you ready to turn in for the night?" I ask her and she nods her head before taking my hand in hers.

I walk beside her with her hand in mine until we reach her guestroom, which is only a few feet from my own room and we stop in front of her door.

"Goodnight, Christian." She hugs me hard with her head resting over my heart and I wrap my arms around her tiny body.

"Goodnight, my sunshine." I tell her before pulling back and planting a lingering kiss on her forehead.

I look at her lovely face and she looks as though she wants to say something, but obviously decides against it as she shakes her head and turns to go into her room.

I let out a deep breath and pivot on my heel so that I can go to my own room, where I'll no doubt have yet another dream where Anastasia and I are together.

* * *

><p><strong>Anastasia <strong>

Why does he have to smell so good and have all of those muscles that tighten around me when he hugs me? I shake my head to clear my thoughts and I walk to the soothing bed that waits for me.

After I pull back the cozy down comforter and crawl into my warm bed, I think back to the progression of my feelings for Christian. He and I have been practically inseparable since we met my freshman year of college, and of course there are times where I think that he and I could be something, and there's always been a part of me that hoped we would end up together, but has it always been love? Is that what I have been feeling all of those years?

I remember the first time he took me home with him to meet his family and I couldn't wait. It was during Christmas break the year that we met, and it was when the thoughts of hoping Christian would be my boyfriend flared.

* * *

><p><em>December 2010<em>

_"What if they hate me? What if they think you shouldn't be friends with me?" I'm a nervous wreck as I sit in the passenger seat of Christian's car. He came to pick me up from Montesano saying that he didn't want to have to spend all of break away from me, and although I've been giving him a hard time about it, I am so glad he did because I couldn't have made it without seeing him for so long. _

_Ever since the day I moved in, he's been right by my side. He and I quickly became best friends, and I am so thankful. He's the first guy I have ever been so physically attracted to and the way he holds my hand and kisses my cheeks constantly makes me feel like he could want me too. I know that he hasn't been with any girls since the school year started, and I also wonder if that's because of me or if he just isn't interested. _

_"Calm down, Ana. They're going to love you." He tells me before reaching over to take my hand in his own. He brings our joined hands to his mouth so he can kiss my fingers and then places our hands on his thigh to rest as he continues driving. _

_"Ooh, pretty." I can't help but squeal as we pull into a tree lined driveway that is lit up brightly with Christmas lights. I hear Christian chuckle and he squeezes my hand but he remains silent. _

_We are soon in front of the most beautiful house I have ever seen. Honestly, 'house' doesn't do this place justice. It's a mansion. I see 2 BMW's and a Mercedes surrounding the house and I look over to a 5 car garage which I assume only houses more luxury vehicles. _

_"Ready?" Christian asks me after he turns off the ignition and moves his body to face me. _

_"I guess." I murmur and look down to my lap. _

_"Hey." He whispers and takes my face between his large hands. "They are going to love you, okay? You have nothing to worry about." _

_I nod my head and he leans his face in to kiss the tip of his nose. My cheeks flush at his intimate gesture and I take a deep breath. Ever the gentleman, Christian gets out first to come around and open my door for me before taking my bag out of the trunk. Whether they like me or not, I'll be staying here with the Grey's for the weekend. _

_"Shall we?" Christian asks as he holds an arm out in signal for me to start walking. _

_As we approach the front door, he takes my hand in his and looks down to me so that I can see his reassuring smile. We barely make it to the door before a gorgeous young woman flings the door open and squeals in excitement. _

_"Christian!" She exclaims before launching herself into his arms and almost knocking him over. He laughs a little and lets go of my hand so he can pat her on the back and steady her. _

_"Hello, Mia." He says and kisses the top of her head and I can't help but smile at his affection towards his sister. _

_"Oh gosh, you're pretty! Christian didn't say how pretty you were!" She tells me before hugging me tightly. I laugh and hug her back. _

_"Thank you, Mia. You're very pretty too." _

_"Let her breathe, Mia." Christian mumbles before taking my hand in his own again, which does not go unnoticed by his sister. _

_"Oh, you two!" She squeals again before clapping her hands and ushering us inside. _

_"Wow." I whisper as we walk into his family home. It's absolutely gorgeous from floor to ceiling and it's hard to take everything in. The gorgeous white marble floors and dark furnishings which are surrounding with the most beautiful red and gold Christmas decorations. "Your house is gorgeous." _

_"Thank you, dear." I hear a woman's voice say and look over to see an elegantly dressed, auburn haired woman smiling brightly at me. _

_"Mother." Christian says and kisses her on her cheek when she nears us, though he never lets go of my hand. _

_"Darling, please introduce us." She says as she looks back to me. _

_"Mother, this is my friend, Anastasia. Ana, this is mother, Grace." _

_"Mrs. Grey, it's so lovely to meet you. Christian talks about you often." _

_"Oh does he?" She smiles and looks to her son who is blushing while still looking at me. "Please, call me Grace. I have been looking forward to meeting you for quite some time." She tells me and hugs me close to her. She keeps me in her arms for several long moments before letting go, only to pull back while holding onto my arms and staring into my eyes. "I'm so glad that you can join us for a few days, Christian's been a grump since he's been home, so maybe having you here will liven him up a bit." _

_"Mom!" Christian whines from beside me and I can't help but laugh at him. Grace laughs too and pulls me away from Christian to bring me further into the house. _

_"Christian, honey, take Ana's things up to the guestroom on the 3__rd__ floor that I have made up for her, and when you come back down we'll be in the kitchen. _

_"Yes, mother." Christian mumbles like a sulking teen and dutifully follows his mother's instruction. _

_I follow Grace into her expansive kitchen where I see a younger blonde woman with pigtails mixing baking ingredients in a large bowl. _

_"We were just making some sugar cookies, would you like to help?" Grace asked. _

_"Yes, of course." I answered her immediately before rolling up my sleeves and going to the sink to wash my hands. _

_"So, tell me, Anastasia. How did you and my son meet?" I hear Grace ask me as I dry my hands on the plush yellow dish towel that matches the various accents of her kitchen. _

_"He hasn't told you?" I ask a little surprised. _

_"No, not exactly. He talks about you every time we speak, but it was as if one day you just showed up out of nowhere. Unexpectedly, but he spoke as if you'd always been there." I blushed profusely as she speaks so affectionately towards me. _

_"Well, I was a little lost on move in day and he helped me find my way." _

_"A little lost? Ana, please." Christian's deep voice comes from beside me and I turn to see him leaning on the doorframe as he smiles brightly at me. "I think you were a little more than lost." _

_"Okay, maybe a little." I giggled and he pushed away from his spot and walked over to me._

_"She was going the complete opposite direction and was mumbling to herself. She's lucky I saved her." He boasts to his mother and then looks to me and winks. I slap his bicep, which makes him laugh, and then he comes to stand behind me so he can wrap his arms around my middle. "I'm lucky you saved me, Anastasia." He whispers in my ear and places a kiss on a sensitive spot underneath my ear that makes me gasp._

_"You two are just precious." Grace gushes from beside me and makes me realize that there are eyes on us, which causes my blush to resurface on my cheeks. _

_"What are you making?" Christian asks as he absentmindedly runs his large, warm, hands up and down my arms as I knead my flour covered hands over a fresh batch of cookie dough. _

_"Sugar cookies." I smile. _

_"I bet they'll be delicious." He tells me and I can feel him inhale deeply through his nose as it nuzzles my hair. "You smell good." _

_"Oh, um, thank you." _

_"You always smell so good." He murmurs and I look up to see that Grace and the blonde haired girl have left the kitchen, leaving Christian and I alone. _

_"I do?" _

_"Oh, yes." He smiles against my neck as his mouth ghosts over my skin. I shiver involuntarily and his arms tighten around me. "Ana?" _

_"Yes?" I ask almost breathlessly. _

_"I've wanted to talk to you about something. I wanted to ask you, well, the thing is…" He's stumbling around his words and I reach over to the dish towel on the counter to clean my hands. I turn around to face him as his arms still rest on the counter by my hips so that I'm blocked in by him. He looks nervous, but at the same time so charming. "What I wanted to say was, well what I wanted to ask is…" _

_"Little brother! You can breathe a little easier knowing your favorite big brother's finally home from school." I hear a loud voice call out as a tall, good-looking gentleman who resembles Christian comes into the kitchen, effectively ruining mine and Christian's almost-intimate moment. "Oh, hello. Who are you?" He smiles alluringly at me, and I look up to see Christian's disappointed face. _

_"Elliot, this is my friend, Anastasia, from school. Ana, this is my older brother, Elliot." _

_"Hello." I say lamely. _

_"Hi, Ana." He says in a flirtatious way and I can feel Christian tense. _

_"Elliot, I think dad was saying something about going over to the McCarron's in a bit. Weren't you saying you wanted to see their daughter, Natalia?" _

_"Ooh, yes. Natalia and I have some catching up to do" He smiles mischievously at Christian and I am glad I don't know the thoughts going through his head. "Nice to meet you, Ana." With that, he turns and leaves the room. _

_I look back up to Christian who is already looking at me with anticipation in his beautiful eyes. _

_"So, that was, Elliot." _

_"He seems nice." I say rather awkwardly. "What were you saying before he came in? Something you wanted to ask?" _

_"Later, okay?" He smiles briefly and I can tell he's frustrated, but I don't know why. _

_"Okay." _

_"Let's finish making these cookies." He kisses my forehead and then leaves me to wash his hands. I watch as his tall, muscular frame stands a few feet from me, and let out a breath at the thought of what it looks like under those clothes. _


End file.
